Finally Guy # 3- PART ONE

As mentioned in my earlier post, Guy #3 is THE ONE big heart ache. This story may sound incredible to some but for us Christians, it is part and parcel of how God moulds us and strengthens us sometimes.

It was 1999, I was sick and tired of dating the "wrong" people. Actually I never considered them dates, usually movies and dinner with people that I cannot connect with. So one fine day, actually it was one night after my usual Worship Devotional Time with God, reading the Bible and praying, I laid my burden to God. By this time, I had moved out and was staying alone in my friend's vacant pre-renovated Bishan flat.

Show me Lord!
"Show me who is the one that you want me to marry, Lord?" I waited in His Presence. Nothing. God did not answer immediately. That very night, I had a strange dream, I was in what looked like the backstage of a building and the stairs OMG, the stairs lead all the way into heaven. There were clouds. Gingerly I took a step up and suddenly out of no where, a man came from behind me and held my right hand. He was medium sized and all I could see was he had very thick eyebrows. He was sporting a army botak hairstyle and we ran happily up the stairs. It was exhilarating!!!!

I woke immediately. Knowing that God had given me this dream. I felt assured that he had indeed prepared someone for me. Someone with the same calling, for we were heading the same direction upwards to heaven. But I can't see clearly who this guy was though I had a weird sense that this person was very near.

At that time, I had just transferred my membership to this mega church in the East. I was so happy that I could finally serve God in the ministry that I loved. I had tried before all sorts of ministries, prayer ministries drained me easily, nursery and children ministries were too tiring physically, I felt like a auntie forever cleaning after the kid's mess and boy I was horrified and refused to clean baby vomit and poo.There was also not much peace with the screaming kids. The handicap ministry was very depressing to me, one visit to the Cheshire Home and I had countless sleepless nights and nightmares, I felt so sorry for the severely handicapped residents that I seriously thought that they were better off somewhere else. I was deeply saddened by their long term physical and mental sufferings.

Anyway, I finally can sing lead vocal. Actually one of the lead vocals that usually carry the melody line as my harmonising was bad. I get thrown off by other people's singing. Hahaha. I love to sing.

OMG It's him
One saturday, I nonchalantly entered the backstage to ready myself for my worship vocal duty and a guy called out to me. "Hey I know you, You are TS's friend." TS was one of my two VJC male buddies. We often studied together, went for fast food meals and movies. He was from VS and had cleft lip and I sort of pitied him as most girls avoided him. Both TS and Win I brought them to my church, they were brothers in christ as well but my stand up sit down hymnal ex-church was too boring for them. They preferred to attend somewhere else.

But this guy, Guy #3, looked familiar but I cannot recall where I had seen him. He seemed to know me and that's the eerie part but I was considered quite High Profile in JC as a trampolining gymnast who often hang out with guys in my leotard (with shorts la!!!! Think What????). During those days my skin was perfect, no pimples, blemishes, hardly moles and freckles and I had very long silky layered hair all the way to near the waist. I could almost do a shampoo commercial!!!!!! Hahaha

Previous Encounters
Of course with the help of the Holy Spirit, I was finally able to recall the circumstances under which I met this guy #3. Now that i recalled these scenes, its almost funny:

Scene One:
TS had just finished his band practice. The band room was in the canteen. TS met me and said he wanted to introduce to me his good friend from VS who was flutist in the band. TS played French Horn and would often practice in front of me when I idle about in the canteen sipping coffee awaiting my next lesson. Sometimes I would watched him clean or polish his brass equipment. I was in the commerce stream since I was not keen on science and my parents said that humanities had no future, I had also given up English Literature which I was interested in to spend more time on my ailing Accounting sujects. In fact, the breaks in between my lessons were so long that I often go movies, shopping and even canoeing.

TS's friend was none other than a very young Guy # 3. He was quite small size for a JC student, had short wavy hair and very thick eye brows. When we were introduced to each other, he did not maintain any eye contact, neither did he smile or shook my hands. His hands were firmly imbedded in both pant pockets. He did not even say Hi or Hello and frankly, he was the rudest person I ever get to know in my life. Remember by this time I had been in my small family church for almost 4 years and I related well to every one from babies to elderly. I don't know why, may be I was having PMS or period or something but I felt offended and was pissed with his new "friend". I remembered exclaiming aloud suddenly that I was going home and I left telling God "this guy is so rude, I don't want to have anything to do with him."

Scene Two
It was Sunday and this sunday TS had invited me to attend his new church which was Guy #3's home church. We were to meet at Toa Payoh and then to take a cab to SLF building. This charismatic church was growing by leaps and bound and many fell under God's power during services. This was very new to me as my non denominational church was mostly about about singing hymns and bible study. We certainly know about God but we were not yet experiencing God in his healing, deliverance and salvation. Both TS and Guy #3 were late. I waited in vain during those pre-handphone days. I only had a Motorola pager much later the next year. After waiting for almost 30 minutes, I gave up attending that SLF service, afterall, my then pastor had preached that it was a cult and that only cults grew fast and furious.

Interesting note: This SLF services were the early beginings of the East Mega church I served as a worship vocalist in. HEE

So here I was staring at Guy # 3 seated on the stairs and having no idea where I had seen him before. Afterall, more than 10 years had past since scene no 1 and 2 happened and we had all grown physically to be very much more attractive. So I actually "know" Guy #3 beforehand.

Well...Feelings grew
Guy #3 was handsome. Medium physique and had very dark slightly wavy hair and very thick eyebrows. His tenor voice was powerful when he sings and sounded quite high pitched when he speaks. (Almost a bit cartoony). He was a very busy houseman with NUH. Coincidentally my sil (Sister in law) was working along side with him in the wards when she was a NUH nurse.

According to my sil, many nurses and trainee nurses, were head over heals with him. He often broke out in song when he was in the resting rooms and even generously ordered pizza for the staff nurses. In church, i know of many girls in the worship team who were jostling to get to know him. Even my super glued friend was deeply smitten.

But AH HA...the catch. He was a very aloof person. He seemed almost unfriendly, living in his own BUBBLE. I was among the priviledged few that was able to dine with him in a group and asked him much about his work and family. In fact, it was a matter of time that I fell for him too, how not to, when that handsome face looked intently at yours when having a common meal. (For the first time I forgot to eat and I lost my voice so to speak). Plus he really sang like a Russell Watson wannabe and could play a mean guitar to lead worship. He was even chosen to be trained as a worship leader and was given many priviledge appearances on stage.

So with time, I grew to be extremely fond of Guy #3 as well. However, competition was so tense, there were many eligible ladies fighting to be near him and he seemed the traditional sort, I was perhaps too wild for him. Afterall, I love bikinis, mini skirts and had given many the impression that I was easy... with many eligible guys or "boyfriends" around me. Deep down inside I felt I was not good enough for him, I mean he was going to be a medical professional, he told me he aspired to be an oncologist and I was selling insurance for a living.

I had struggled much and managed to graduate with an accountancy degree of which I was not at all keen. I had also earlier broken a bond with my previous audit firm. It was ridiculous but for 6 months I had no pay as my pay was meant to pay for leaving the firm earlier than contracted. It was a stupid contract that I did not read carefully. This audit firm binds us for 2 years and if you should leave earlier it was considered a breach and you need to repay the firm the no of months in lieu. I briefly chatted with a lawyer friend who said there was no precedence and I might as well pay and leave peacefully rather than incur hefty legal fees. Remaining in the job was not an option as I literally dragged myself to work and quite often we worked past mid night. In those days, fresh graduates were being bullied upside down. I worked on weekends as well and we were not allowed any leave or medical leave unless emergencies for 6 months which was the peak period.

Another silly point was I was then residing with 5 other family members in a 3 room flat of 54 sq m. We were crammed like sardines when it was bed time and to me the house was always in a mess. No matter how you packed it, the very ultra old furniture needed to make way for the new. Many things ought to be discarded. You see our new 5 room flat at Sengkang was long long long overdue. (We waited a total 6 years for it, in finally came 2001. HDB!!!!!!!). I was determined not to have a boyfriend before I had a new place or room. I can't imagine my guy looking at the mess and concluding that I would be a sloppy future domestic manager. I was that house proud!!!!

Somehow feelings ruled. Boldly I asked God to prepare me, to mould me to be a good wife. God told me that I was to pray for him until he told me to stop. I obeyed and prayed for him daily using the book The Power of a Praying Wife as a rough guide.

Occasionally when I did not see him at vocal meetings or church meetings I would doubt alot. You sure God?? Did I hear you correctly??? He tallied with the dream, was he really the ONE????

I am a Dreamer
One night I dreamt he was going to be enlisted. The next day when my team was on duty, (he was in a different team, Thank God, other wise I could not concentrate singing. Hahaha.) he came to tell me that he was going to army in Mandarin. (Aiya, I dont know why guys usually speak to me in Mandarin, may be my phoenix almond eyes screams CHEENA). Immediately I told him I dreamt that he was going army the night before. "Then you must pray for me. I old already can't run liao" (So cute!!!) Ya...I had forgotten, at the age of 27, he had not yet serve his national service, for he had deferred them to study medicine.....a 6 year course. No wonder God said I was to WAIT for him. I felt priviledged to be given this probably 2.5 year long prayer assignment.