Thursday, 30 April 2009

Sigh........dr zhivago

I've watched the russian war epic Doctor Zhivago on you tube in one setting. Boy was I overwhelmed with melancholy. The story is so moving and I cannot help but feel the impossible love that Yuri Zhivago has for Lara and all the sadness of all the parties involved amidst the war. Hans matheson is so perfect for the role. He's a sensitive musical soul and appreciates poetry himself. This TV miniseries remake of the 1965 version stars a 17 year old Keira Knightly whose beautiful face is so refreshing to look at. Put them together and the entire film with its beautiful scenery, the historic war documentary clips and the moving music by ludovico so perfect.

Actually there is very little dialogue in the movie. Many of the scenes required great acting since the emotions were all communicated in the facial expressions, body language and the eyes- the windows of the soul. Frankly, Hans matheson melts my heart. He first captured it being Marius Pontmercy in Les Miserables film with the innocent looking Claires Danes. His deep set blue eyes speaks volumes and often the tears make you want to have a good cry too! Join him, be with him in the acting etc etc. There's a part of me that loves to act but I prefer to be a private person.

Any way this whole hans matheson thing is making me feel much emotionally and muscially. I am re-engaging and nursing my literary side which i once loved about myself. Shakespeare, william wordsworth, jane austen, leo tolstroy etc ya, music and poetry go hand in hand Schmann would definitely agree wholeheartedly. Its just a pity that i spent most of mid 2001-2002 crying over a doc wilson when I could have done so over such a good love story Doctor Zhivago. Nevertheless, I am not afraid to admit that i want to know hans, however impossible it may seem and I am not even a beautiful young lara nor keira. hahaha

Tuesday, 28 April 2009

Smitten Again

Boy, I am smitten again. Was watching Les Miserables film, not exactly a good protrayal of the fantastic musical when the young Marius pontmercy caught my attention. I wish I was Cosette or Claire Danes. My goodness! The way Hans Matheson looks at her, his perfect blue eyes is enough to make me fall in love again...with a screen lover!!! Hahahaha.

My past screen lovers include: Tom Cruise from Top Gun when I was in secondary school uniform. He was subsequently replaced by Brad Pitt from Legends of the Fall, Meet Joe Black etc and I actually loved Leonardo Di Caprio in Romeo and Juliet and of course the heart sinking Titantic, Gangs of New York, Catch me if you can etc.

Zac Efron is cute but he's too young for me. I mean he's also rachel's favourite in the 3 High School Musical dvds that we own. In fact, my good movie loving heart had been searching for a good replacement for Leo, and don't ask me why. I mean these "subconscious" activities are not fore most important and are often left to sleepless thoughts at night.

Then because of Susan Boyle, the old fat and ugly blest with a beautiful voice contestant in Britain's Got Talent, I revised Les Miserables. I watched the anniversary concert and borrowed a film starring Liam Neeson as Jean Valjean. Frankly I've sped read this Victor Hugo novel once, its quite boring actually as with most classics with so many information that we cannot relate to. In addition, I've watched the heart moving musical at the Royal Albert Hall in London when I was in Europe in 1995 but remembering more the Inspector Javert who had long silky blonde pony tail hair and was relentless in his pursuit of the criminal Jean Valjean. This is an epic about law verus grace, kindness verus cruelity filled with love, laughter and loss. Yan even owns the programme and scores having watched it in Singapore decades ago.

Suddenly, I fell in love! with the first marius pontmercy that caught my attention!!! Hans Matheson at 1998 probably about 23, so handsome and perfect. I could almost touch him, as his character and his acting touches my heart. My only complaint is the TV is only 21 inches!!! And I could hardly watch the movie uninterrupted by rachel who is terrified of the horse and carriages sound. The few scenes with the young actor born in the same year as my beloved husband Yan 07 Aug 1975, is enough to start a Hans Matheson fever!!! I watched his you tubes and read his bios and became a fan over night.

I learnt that he came from a musician family and played both guitar and violin (for the roles in Still Crazy and Canone Inverso: Making Love respectively). He writes and sings and plays the harmonica as well. Some of the movies include songs that he wrote and so on, I felt like I unearthed a gem. Afterall, I have been attracted to beautiful men before especially when they are equally talented musically. That explains why I fell for Wilson when I asked him to play me the Ballade Pour Adeline at the Touch Music office in 1998? Unfortunately his piano playing was really rusty and he could not get pass ten bars or so??? Then of course, I am touched and fell for my best male friend Yan who plays the piano very well and excels in Chopin and Rachmaninov pieces. Yan is well formed, good looking and had a very gentle soul. He offers perfect companionship and support especially when I became pregnant and a full time mother. In Yan I found a soul mate, one who patiently waited for me as I recover from all that Wilson madness!

Any way, Hans Matheson who was listed alongside Orlando Bloom, Heath Ledger and the Jake guy also with Oliver Martinez??? as young male leads to watch out for in the early 2000s caught my heart. I went on to watched Canone Inverso: Making Love and this epic war romance music theme blow me away. I loved the movie the soundtrack, the storyline, the plot the everything. I like this story set during World War One where a strange violin and the love of music led two best friends in the conservatory to the secret that there are in fact brothers of the same father who owned the violin. And of course I loved the forbidden love between Jeno and Sophie a much older married Jewish pianist.

In fact I cannot help wondering why such a moving movie was not a blockbuster. Perhaps its an italiano production 2000 or really there was no major marketing or advertising. Hans Matheson now age 33 had such varied acting experiences in Nero, Canone Inverso, and Les miserables. I can't wait to see more of him in his other movies and tv miniseries Dr Zhivago, The mists of Avalon and Tess.

I prayed he will make it big soon. Like i prayed for Andy Lau, Leon Lai who went on the become more famous. I know he will in no time bag an award for his superb acting. In the mean time I am content to watch the you tube videos while he contends with the horses and playing music in the countryside???? Lewis??? I don't know where but somewhere without shopping malls and crazy office sky scrapers i suppose. Somewhere you can ride on a horse sans smell, let the wind blow your hair all wild and still know how to get home without a mobile phone or a cab. Hahaha

Thursday, 23 April 2009

A questionaire just for fun

I chanced upon this questionaire to David Garrett and decided to put my own answers-just for fun.

As a child I was the leader of the pack, full of visions and directions, always strategising and delegating.

As a pensioner I will be more relaxed finally but there again I will most probably help out with the grand kids.

The motto of my life is to exceed my own expectations and excel in the things that I love.

My favourite travel destination is Europe. I want to be able to visit often.

My greatest luxury is to have time relaxing in a spa and shopping of course!

I relax the most having a massage.

My friends tell me that I am over worked without domestic help.

My favourite flower is the the deep red rose, the imagery of passion.

My biggest fear is to leave my family prematurely leaving a loving husband and a young child to cope with the physical and emotional loss.

My favourite meal is black pepper crabs.

I have the best ideas when I was about to sleep, going through my mental checklists.

I lie............never. I believe in being true to myself and having high levels of integrity. The truth will set us free.

I break out in tears when I am alone and reminiscing the past; be it previous relationship attempts or the memories of my late grand parents and mum.

On my gravestone should be written....Always done her best and excel in the things close to her heart. An excellent wife, mother, cook and violinist.

For the love of my life I would sacrifice my own physical and material needs.

Wednesday, 22 April 2009

No Getaway afterall

Had wanted to go on a weekend getaway -Hong Kong in mid april. Afterall, I've not travelled on the plane for more than 10 years, the last trip being to Thailand in 1998. Since I became a Mrs- I travelled mainly on the cab, mrt and bus and the occasionally torturous KTM to Kluang to visit mil. Now that Rachel is 4 and fully toilet trained, I longed for a family holiday!

The plan was to meet Yan after his work at Changi Terminal 3 and catch an evening flight to Hong kong. Another thing as a local bred Singaporean, I've yet the opportunity to travel on SIA. The last good holiday i had to Europe in 1995 -graduation year, we chose Air France over SIA to save a few hundred dollars getting into Paris and back from London. That was by far the most memorable trip of my life. I spend 32 days in Europe and I need to return to this beautiful continent often and much. Perhaps we could live in some cities for a few years to soak up the culture and the history and the life!!!!

Accordingly we would check into a good hotel in the Tsim Sha Tsui area in Kowloon overlooking the harbour. It is also walking distance to the Hong Kong City Cultural Centre where my current violin idol David Garrett would be playing my favourite Bruch Violin Concerto in G minor on Saturday 18 April. Earlier in day, I thought it would be great to spend a few hours at Hong kOng disney land where rachel begins her" initiation rites" I've been a fan of Euro Disney but Yan is not so pro Disney neither is he pro Pixar. Shopping and dining will be given their priorities as well.

Unfortunately, it did not materialise. A part of me was bitterly disappointed. The other part was numb and sad that after tithing much and giving to the building fund, our basic needs are still not met. I say basic since we did not even have a honeymoon and as a full time mum, I do not enjoy even a day off though realistically after a trip the mother still had lots to unpack and wash. It just saddens me much that we have basically zero travel budget.

My only comfort lies in Rachel resuming her violin lessons. Its almost $400 monthly for our fees and just yesterday, our angel said she want to audition for a place in music school. Well we have until Nov to get ready for the intake beginning Jan 10. What surprises me was neither the teacher nor Yan said anything negative. It was all peace and green light. Amy in particular felt it was good to work towards something and accepted the task of getting rachel ready for the all important admission auditon. Well. I fully believe GOD alone will bless us with talents, favours and plentiful opportunities.

Perhaps one day, rachel will play on the same stages with the same orchestras as David had done before. What a comforting thought! *smile*

Thursday, 9 April 2009

Recharging -Omnitrix way

Sigh....so tired. Been playing and attending to rachel's every need while cleaning the house and doing laundry. Yes, sometimes I wish I have an Omnitrix and can therefore turn myself into Four Arms so I can complete the many chores earlier leaving time to rest and practice the violin. Other times, I wish I could be an Upgrade, not the mechanical metamorph alien but upgrade the lifestyle so I just supervise the cleaning of the entire house. After all, aint it more important to coach my only child who is home-schooled and learning so fast and of course, devoting myself to upgrade my musical skills as well.

Ben 10 cartoon is such a god sent. Rachel is blessed with so many dvd titles and a huge library of books and activities and a toy room even but there is nothing like Ben 10 cartoons that we both love. It has the ability to capture our attention for more than 2 hours. With the subtitles she is learning sentences way above her nursery level and of course, I've started to teach her mandarin which also means that the language options in dvds become very useful a teaching tool.

Some may argue that its a mildly violent cartoon but come on, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles that I grew up with and Transformers are no better. I do not believe in over shielding a children so as to prolong their innocence in a "make believe fantasy world". Even at age 4, I discuss with Rachel events like the Italy earthquake, the geylang serai food poisoning and also the tragedy at NTU campus. I want her to understand that this is not a perfect world that we live in and yes mummy gets tired sometimes, she is no Gwen (Alien Force version) and needs time and space to chill, to re-charge. Even the Omnitrix needs that.

Last night was silly. Imagine I sprinted home with Rachel so just she could catch her Alien Force episode on TV after dinner at Thai Pan. Its no joke! The amount of stress the mummy had speed eating the curry fish head while making sure the kid does not sprint out of the restaurant in its all too familiar surroundings, since we used to reside in Mandarin Gardens. One must always be vigilant about the swimming pools near by and the fact that rachel had yet to start her swimming lessons. This year the focus is on violin lessons which costs $150 a month.

(personally I almost drown not once not twice but thrice as a toddler so I am not taking any chances concerning this.)

Finally, I have found a new way to relax. Playing Monopoly Jr and Monopoly as a family and of course enjoying Ben 10 Alien Force. The relationship between Gwen and Kevin is so reflective of similar experiences. It helps too that Kevin Levin looks hunky and manly while Ben at 15 still looks like a boy. or as Gwen used to address a "dweeb"-unimportant, insignifcant person or "doofus"-stupid, incompetent, foolish person. Ha

Tuesday, 7 April 2009

Frankly speaking -fixing violin again

Since the italian violin maker and restorer Marco Minnozzi is in town this week, I decided to send my only violin for an assessment at Frank Brothers. After an honest analysis, we decided to do the minor repairs (again!) of triming the bridge, altering the nut and adjusting the sound post. For a $100 it seems cheap compared to my previous visit to Per Ovesen at Hillcrest Arcadia the cab fare alone costs much. But seriously, I was taken aback by the casual comments of the middle aged lady manager.

First of all, in front of the violin maker and Melina with whom I just had lunch with and young Rachel. She told me bluntly my bow hold is wrong. Sigh!!! I am still working on perfecting the hold and will never ever let any one comment on this ever!!!! Then the tactless woman asked me if it was my son's violin. God! Do I look so old. I mean to have a kid who can already play a full size violin, surely the kid gotta be already more than 10 years, right????Arghhhhhhhh!

Any way, I can't wait for the day when will walk into another high end violin shop and buy the violin of my dreams and enjoy good service. Basic good service which welcomes a customer be it a beginner, intermediate, advanced or professional string player-local or foreigner.

At the end of the day, I took comfort and thank God that indeed the violin sounded better and more comfortable to play on for a small fee. Its his favour on an anointed instrument. I resolve to play better and when I can play in tune, from memory and in time, in other words when I am ready to move on, God will surely supply a much better instrument for me.

In the mean time, Yan needs a grand piano to practice his exam pieces like the chopin "heroic" polonaise. Lord, we believe you will provide us with the best including a suitable luxurious next home. Jesus Christ our Lord, when he died on the cross and shed his precious blood for us. He alone is the qualification for us to receive and enjoy all of your blessings. Thank you Heavenly Father. Amen

Thursday, 2 April 2009

What a God sent neighbour.

In mid 2007 I was asking God for a violin teacher that I could click with and who is able to teach young children. This person preferably a young lady should reside near me since I had to bring rachel then still 2 everywhere being her main care-giver.

Indeed nothing is impossible with God. Amy became an integral part of my life and soon rachel's life as well. She was just a block away in the same Mandarin Gardens estate and that made it a breeze to have violin lessons both personally and some 6 months later-lessons for rachel as well though she was still in diapers and throws occasional tantrums.

After moving to the next door condo, Neptune Court in September last year, every wednesday became quite a chore to me. Its no joke! I had to carry 2 violins and my child and walked some 10 minutes to the estate that we used to live in for lessons. By the time I reached Amy's studio I was sweating and my shoulders ached. It kinda affected my learning as well and I complained much of the rotar cuff tendonities that gave me hell often before it rains. Rheumatism??? Thankfully, through the partaking of Lord's Supper and prayer with anointing oil, the pain was gone and the entire old injury completely healed as Christ had already redeemed our illnesses on the cross to give us perfect health.

Those days, I remembered praying for my violin teacher to move closer to me. Then it happened! At the end of her lease, she moved just a block away from mine in Neptune Court. So last Wednesday was such a breeze again. I was carrying 2 violins in cases and rachel was scooting Darby style as in Winnie the Pooh super sleuths, with her Dora lunch box breakfast in her High School musical plastic tote bag to Amy's place for our lessons. I hardly broke out in sweat despite the warm weather and we could leave home with windows still opened and laundry still being washed. What a perfect blessing!!

Rachel resumed her lessons with much success. In fact it was the best ever. Perhaps she is now fully toilet trained and clearly more mature as a child. It also helps that Amy's studio had a glass door so the apprehensive parent can check out the kid and the fearful children may feel secure that the parents are just waiting outside in the living area. Perhaps Yan is right. We had started her too young a day before she turned 3 for formal one to one violin lessons but indeed nothing is wasted as she who now asked for lessons waste no time remembering all she had learnt in the past.

I feel so blest. That God will go all the way out to bless my family with a good teacher whose studio is proximate and now being neighbours we naturally progressed on in our friendships. In fact, I had the priviledge to lunch with her on tuesday at parkway delifrance after helping her solve her pest problem of unwanted mynah bird nests in her air con condenser unit. Actually not me but my pest control guy that agreed to the ad hoc job for a small fee. Still, the episode of relocating the chicks and witnessing the parent birds anxiety and care for the young excited us much.

I believe by the grace of God, we will both progress well through all the suzuki volumes and perform well soon. In fact, I asked God for a better quality violin since I now understand the importance of a singing voice, bel canto and also a focused sound. I know he will go all the way out to bless me with one that I love and enjoy playing with. Thank you Father GOD.